August 16, 2023 It was a “Darcy moment.” I was at Our Lady of the Adirondacks House of Prayer for Foundation Day. I was the guest speaker. To say I was nervous might be the understatement of the century. I was terrified. I don’t usually get very nervous about regular public speaking – delivering a prepared talk about a topic I’ve researched, but public sharing – talking about my personal experiences – is one of my biggest fears. The House of Prayer was offering First Saturday devotions prior to the Foundation Day activities. I arrived early enough to pray those devotions. Sitting in the back pew with a friend, I had my travel mug of coffee next to me. As my friend and I moved forward to kneel, we quickly discovered the pew was not bolted to the floor. The pew rocked, knocking over my cup of coffee and spilling its contents all over the pew, my laptop bag and the hoodie I had been wearing when I arrived. Normally, a very visible mistake when I’m already stressed/anxious would probably make me cry or get more nervous. My spilled coffee, though, seemed very funny to me. I think God was telling me to get out of my own way. He was saying, “you’ve done the Darcy thing. Now, let me do my thing.” And God did His thing. He got me through my fear. About a minute after I stepped up to the podium, my nerves settled. I can’t say I was comfortable, but I wasn’t very uncomfortable, either. And I don’t think I did badly. I’m not sure I said anything helpful or insightful, but I think I did a decent job sharing my relationship with God and with prayer. While I went into the morning feeling as though I had nothing useful to say and convinced it would be an awful experience for all involved, the Lord squashed those feelings and the evil one who was feeding them in me. He helped me share how he’s helping me get closer to him. It was such a God moment. |
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